Selasa, 02 Juli 2013

How to Gain Trust: 4 Tips

Being trustworthy is a highly valued quality in a person, trust is one of the key foundations of any relationship that we have with people. If you're worried that people might not trust you then you can incorporate these tips to help gain trust between others.


1. Honesty

You've often heard "honesty is the best policy", reason being; because it is. The more you tell the truth to other people, the more they are going to trust what you say - seems like common sense. 

Don't go avoiding those white lies either, a white lie whilst you may think is harmless, is still a lie, the fact that we call them a white lie is just an excuse for us to lie when we want to. If you can tell 'white lies' with ease, what's to stop you from starting to tell lies more often?
You may be thinking, "well surely I shouldn't tell the truth if it is going to offend someone?" You don't have to offend someone by telling the truth, telling the truth doesn't mean that you have to be completely blunt and straight to the point  where it could be seen as bordering on rude. For example: Say a family member or partner asks you if what they are wearing makes them look fat. If what they are wearing does make them look slightly larger than they usually do, you don't have to say "yes" because you are telling the truth. You could say something like "You look fine (which shouldn't be a lie as a persons weight shouldn't be a problem to you), but I think that other thing you were wearing looked better on you". A person would much rather you state your honest opinion, and will value you it more if you were to give advice. If people know that you don't lie and are an honest individual then you will be considered more trustworthy.

2. Avoid Vagueness

When a situation arises where you could be vague, instead don't be and go into more detail. For example: If you are asked how was your day?, a very simple and vague answer would be to say fine. However, you could say why it was fine, what went well and what didn't. If a person sees that you are willing to share information then they're likely to do so with you.

3. Don't Gossip

Gossiping is a horrible thing to do and is something that we're all guilty of at some time or another. If a person entrusts you with some information, why then would you go and tell others and betray their trust? All that you are doing is wanting to be the first one to share some unknown information with people for a topic of conversation, it's idle talk about someone-elses privacy . The end result will be the same when that person finds out that you have been the one to instigate the gossiping about them - they will lose there trust in you, and could lead to a falling-out over the matter which is something best avoided.

I can remember a time earlier in my life where I had been the instigator of gossip involving someone, not out of maliciousness, but for something to talk about. Looking back I can see that it wasn't a nice thing to do and was not the way I should have behaved. I did end up falling out with that person over it regrettably for a few weeks. The gossip died down after only a day or two though, so after I was left with an awkwardness around the people involved. Since then, luckily and thankfully, I have been able to make up with them and they are my friends to this day. It has been one of those experiences that you learn from, you don't have to make that mistake though, learn from others mistakes - like mine.

4. Don't Break Promises

This ties directly in with not lying. Keeping your promises shows that you are a dependable person, and for someone to trust you will require them to think you are a dependable person. It doesn't have to be officially made known that it is a promise for you to have to keep it. So often you'll hear people say "yeah I did say I would do that but I never promised it" as an excuse for not doing something that they said they would do.
If you say you are going to do something then you should follow through with actions, and if people see that you do what you say you are going to do then they will mark you out as a dependable person who they can trust.

"To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved."
George MacDonald

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